Speaking from your heart, A Universal Language

 

Last week I received a call from my friend, Colena, who I have known for the past 10 years through playing basketball together and as a graduate of the RCB parenting course. She asked me if I would come and be a guest speaker to this group of Women.  This, however, was no ordinary group of Women.

As it turns out, my friend had gotten involved in a Women’s Leadership Program at UCSD.  This particular program was housing approximately 14 Women Community Leaders from within several Latin American Countries.  The US Embassy’s in each Country had recognized and chosen them to partake in this one week Women Empowerment Leadership retreat. I was honored that Colena had thought of me and I graciously accepted her invitation. Shortly after accepting the speaking engagement, she informed me that out that out of 14 women with whom I would be speaking to, none of them spoke English. Needless to say, I would be speaking via an interpreter.

I spent almost a full day with these women. The majority of them had traveled from their indigenous villages in countries like Chile, Venezuela, Argentina, Bolivia, Columbia and Mexico.  I watched carefully as each Woman shared their story. As I simultaneously listened to our interpreter and his slightly delayed translations through my earpiece, I noticed that despite their stories of repression, abuse and lack of access to formal education, these women showed intelligence, power and compassion.

They talked about things such as oneness and how all of us our connected.  One woman went on to explain that “race” is only something that we as a society have developed in order to discriminate and distinguish among people of different color.  She ended by saying that the only true race is the human race and we must all come together if we want to make a difference in this world.

It was easy to see why these women had been chosen.  Each of them possessed an incredible amount of courage and ability to speak from their hearts.  As each woman stood and shared their unique story, none of them held back the raw emotion that accompanied their life experiences. Even for someone like me, whose Spanish vocabulary is very limited could connect with and appreciate the display of humanness right in front of me. This rawness of human emotion is what made it possible for each and every one of us to immediately open and connect through our hearts. I didn’t need an interpreter to understand what these women had gone through to get here.  It was clear that they all had a story, a purpose and a passion.

When I got up to speak, I told them about my own journey with my family, my sons and the impact I had hoped to make in this world. Though the barriers of our two languages were clearly present, it was also clear that the same barriers didn’t apply when we spoke through our hearts. No matter what language you speak, or what part of the world you come from, everyone and anyone was able to recognize this heart-centered, universal language.

At the end of the day, I went to bed thinking about what it means to speak from your heart. I realized that for most of us, this would probably be one of the most uncomfortable things you can think of.  Yet these women, amongst their peers and a couple of strangers, demonstrated this with ease and grace.

It was one of the most powerful things I had ever seen.  There were no worries about what other people thought, no second-guessing themselves, just emotion in its truest form.  It was if they had found freedom in the ability to feel, to connect and for a few of them to love again.  I would like to think that these women learned as much from me as I did from them that day. It was incredibly inspiring  to experience them having a voice and being vulnerable and trusting enough to share their story.

May each of you reading this take the time to consciously share this universal language with someone you come in contact with today.

 –Susie Walton 

The Importance of working through Core Issues before pregnancy.

All parents want the best for their children. When I had my first child at the age of 24 I knew I wanted the best for him, however, I never took the time to ask myself, “What does wanting the best for my child really mean to me?”  When I finally sat down and asked myself this question, I realized that what I wanted for my child and what I was able to provide for my child were two different things.  

The fact is we all have limiting beliefs that are developed by the age of 7. In my book, Key to Personal Freedom, How Myths Affect Our Family Lives, I give examples of some of these limiting beliefs. One example that many of us can identify with is the belief that 'Mistakes' are Bad.

If you can think back to when you were a child, and remember getting in trouble whenever you made a mistake ex: spilled your milk or didn't make it to the bathroom on time, there is a good chance you have the belief that mistakes are bad. So the way that this mistaken belief gets implemented with your kids is when someone makes a mistake, especially when you are tired... there goes your serenity and we often end up yelling at our kids.

Another myth I often see is 'A good parent never thinks of her or him self first". If this is a belief of yours you will end up stressed out and not having a whole lot of fun raising your kids.

This is why I find it extremely important to do some personal growth work before baby comes, (or for those of you who already have kids the sooner the better). At Indigo Village, we have a weekend seminar called, The Remembrance Course. The sole purpose of this course is for you to experience the freedom of letting go of core issues and limiting beliefs and replacing them with new beliefs that will give you the freedom to create the life and the family of your dreams.

I recommend this course to just about all the couples and families that I see in my practice.  In gaining some awareness around your core issues, we are then able to look at new beliefs we would like to create in order to produce the outcome that we desire the most. Some new beliefs you would want to anchor in from our previous examples is that 'Mistakes' are actually wonderful opportunities to learn and grow from, or that taking care of yourself helps you be a better parent.

Ultimately, what gets in the way of allowing our kids to experience their own journey is us! These limiting beliefs get in the way of parenting our children the way we want to parent. Being proactive about your core beliefs is a responsibility that every parent should think about for themselves and for their family.  –Susie Walton

The Importance of Partnership between Home and School

The word “Partnership” is a beautiful one and carries with it, so many meanings for so many people. So how do we establish a common idea of partnership? It takes communication, it takes time & effort and it takes a willingness to be partners. The foundation for such a partnership should be the mutual belief that each party has your child’s best interest at heart. In order to establish this belief, time and energy needs to be put into formulating and growing the relationship between home and school.  Some suggestions for doing so are:

1. Take the time - to insure you understand the philosophies of the school’s programs and curriculum.
2. Participate – Participate in school meetings and events. Meetings are designed to take care of your questions and concerns, to provide you further knowledge of how the classroom and school operate and to allow you the opportunity to create relationships with your child’s teachers and other parents whose children are enrolled in your child’s class. School events enrich your experience of the school. Socializing with one another is a wonderful opportunity to relate with all members of the community and to develop relationships at a deeper level.
3. Enroll in Redirecting Children’s Behavior & Participate in Parent Education Programs – By doing so, it allows consistency & continuity to be created between home and school and a common language can be established.
4. Communicate, Communicate, Communicate – Any time you have a question, concern or idea, please make the time to speak to your child’s teacher, an administrator or anyone who can successfully assist you in coming to a conclusion that will work in the best interest of everyone involved. Communication is the cornerstone of any successful relationship. With communication – All things are possible; Without it – Nothing is.

Village Gate Children’s Academy is a partner with Indigo Village. Partnership is a cornerstone of our program. Village Gate Children’s Academy serves children Kindergarten through Sixth Grade with Academic Year Programs and Summer Programs. We invite you to find out more by attending our Open House on June 10^th at 6:30 PM at Indigo Village or visit our website at: www.villagegateacademy.com.

Parents, don't overbook your family this Summer!

It's easy to overbook your family during the Summer months. Camps and family vacations are a good thing and at the same time it's important to balance these activities out with free time.  Here are some suggestions on creating a balanced summer with your family.

Open up your Calendar
Print out your calendar and show it to your kids.  Start filling in the dates and activities that you already have planned and look for ways to balance out the scheduled activities with free time.  Free time can be as simple as going to the beach or local park. Whatever you do, make sure your kids have to time to develop self- direction and self-motivation on how they would like to spend their free time versus someone organizing it for them or telling them what to do.

Develop a Family Vacation with Guidelines
Before you head off for your family adventure, find some general guidelines that will ensure your family will get the most out of the trip.  Ask everyone, "What are some of the things you would like to see or do?" This will clarify what your plans will look like and everyone feels like they have will have some success. Don't forget to include down time and create a plan that works for everyone.

Take time for yourself
Planning is great and in the end, you don't want to get overwhelmed.  Model for your kids that self-care is important and take some time out for yourself.  A walk around the neighborhood, a hike or even a bath (by yourself).